Gratitude

The Dying Art of Thanks and Gratitude

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Today I was walking out of a local coffee shop and saw a woman coming towards the entrance. She was about 30 feet from the  door so I had every right to just keep on walking. Instead I decided to wait and hold the door for her as she made her way up the stairs. As she approached she made no eye contact with me. As she walked passed me through the door she didn’t even pause to slide me a quick thank you or a smile. I even followed up on the phantom Thank You with a “your welcome”  but that did not slow her down. She was stuck in her own little world walking with an air of righteousness that made me laugh out loud inside my head while holding back my innate desire to stick my foot out.

The whole scene was disappointing but it is something I am seeing it more and more these days. For someone who is far from perfect but does try to take that extra step where I can, it is becoming more and more frustrating to deal with this fall of gratitude.

Do any of these scenarios sound familiar?

  • You let a pedestrian cross in front of you and proceed to watch them take their time slothing across the street without even a wave of the hand in thanks.
  • You walk behind a person as they enter a building and have the door slammed in your face when it could have easily been held for you.
  • You are about to walk into an elevator and a person who could have seen you coming if they just looked hits the “close door” button right when you are about to get in.
  • You sit on a train and see an elderly person standing and  holding on for dear life while a group of teenagers take up 4 seats.
  • You sit next to someone on the train, at a sporting event, or some other public place and they talk on their cell as if no one else is around them.
  • You have someone not use their turn signal and almost cause you to slam into them?
  • You pay for something and not get a thank you from the cashier?

Each of these things happened to me more at least once last week alone.  I believe each of these stem from something that becoming less and less important in this world. The act of treating people the way you would want to be treated.

Whoever came up with this simple statement was dead on and should be given a monument. We can all do it starting right now. Think about the impact your actions have on others and find ways to make that impact a positive one for everyone involved. I strongly believe that this self-awareness can only lead to stronger relationships, more opened doors in all aspects of your life, everyone treating each other like a person versus a category, and the great feeling of receiving a thank you for something that took little or no effort on your part.

Go ahead and try it. No one has the right to the thanks or the help of others but everyone has the ability to offer both to everyone around them.

I will get off my soap-box now. Thanks for listening.

Enjoy.

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  • Letting the pedestrian cross then them taking their time is the worse. I always let people cross when I am driving, and it drives me crazy when they take their time to cross and fail to even waive. Something that is new for me too, is when I am pushing my child in her stroller on the right side of the sidewalk. A large group will come walking towards us, and not move even though they are taking up the whole sidewalk.
  • nan hill
    i'm a drill sargent with my kids when it comes to 'please' and 'thank you. what happened to common courtesy? if it skipped a generation, i promise to help my kids generation will bring it back!!
  • Same here. The passing of morals and proper behavior goes a long way. And it is up to us to ensure that it never dies.
  • It's frustrating and true. However, instead of us worrying about how other people react I feel like we can definitely take hold of our actions. I think it's the little things that count in life. If someone held the door for me like that, I would have the biggest smile on my face and send so much thanks your way! So kudos to you! It's nice to do things like that. Karma's a bitch anyway, right?
  • Thank you, refreshing to hear. I love when people cut you off on the highway, even when they know they need to be in the right lane for miles, they somehow have to cut you off at the last minute.
  • John, I was thinking about that last night. haha. Maybe we could make one huge monument for everyone one who helped to champion that saying. It would be a pretty powerful statement.
  • Dave - that person would have to be a lot of people. The Ethic of Reciprocity - "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" - is foundational in virtually every major religion. Cool Wikipedia article on the same - http://tr.im/e55d
  • Ahhh, truer words were never spoken. I live in South Florida where all the rude misfits from around the world seem to flock, and I keep saying that one day I will write a book about all of this nonsense!
    I was taught, and do teach our daughter, that gratitude is NOT optional. It's required. I cannot tell you how many men have dropped their jaws when I walked through the door they so graciously held for me and I stopped and said a simple "thank you". It still gives me joy to do so, because it helps me to realize there are still gentlemen in this world!
    Another disappearing art: the art of the hand written thank you.
    It's hard sometimes to continue to be kind, and grateful when so many around you are so NOT...but remember, you're a better person for it, whether they noticed or not. It just makes me happy to be grateful!!!
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